Have you ever asked for God to take you deeper in your relationship with Him? It’s a faith-filled desire given to us by God Himself. It’s a stirring from within as we see God’s character revealed in our lives and come to know His faithfulness, producing discontentment. Our spirit is amped up when we see God work, and we want more. It’s as if a veil of limitation, self-doubt, and fear is lifted, and we are simply looking into the eyes of our God with complete security and peace.
I imagine this was Peter after participating in the miracle of Christ’s multiplication of the loaves and the fishes. So as he peered at a figure in the night while waves crashed around the boat Christ told him to get into, he had god-given courage. Inside of him was a stirring that wasn’t content simply asking Christ to come to save him from the storm. No, he asked Christ to call him deeper. He knew the character of Christ, and he had already seen the impossible earlier that day. At that moment, the surrounding storm was secondary to the desire of Peter’s heart to be a greater participator in Christ’s work. We know the story from there. Peter did the impossible. In the midst of the storm, Peter took a step of faith and walked on water. Then his focus shifted. Then Peter realized he was out of control, and he floundered.
Immediately Jesus spoke to them. “Have courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter answered him, “command me to come to you on the water.” He said, “Come.” And climbing out of the boat, Peter started walking on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the strength of the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me!” Matthew 14:27-30
This is such an accurate description of my walk with God over the last few months. The show of faith, the stepping out, and most of all, the “Oh crud” moment followed by me reaching out to be saved from drowning. And I knew the same question Christ asked of Peter would be asked of me, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt? (Matthew 14:31).” It looked like a failure and, on top of that, a reprimand. Trust me, it felt like a failure as grabbed for my discipleship leaders after choking on water. I felt ridiculous and embarrassed for stepping out of the boat in the first place. I armed myself to hear the reprimand, the “O you of little faith.” The words came, but the tone was one I didn’t expect. They didn’t come as an accusation but as encouragement. “First, let’s get you breathing normally again.” I was told. “Good. Now, let’s look at God’s love and His faithfulness. Do you see it? Why did you doubt it? How can we help you step out of the boat again?”
Immediately Jesus reached out his hand, caught hold of him, and said to him, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?” Matthew 14:31
This isn’t a failure; it is growth. It is discipleship. It is evidence of a faith that isn’t stagnant, but constantly reaching for God. This is the process in which one step on the water turns into two, three, and four. Don’t be afraid to ask for the deeper things of God, but don’t go on the journey alone. We will be imperfect in our pursuit, but those who trust in the Lord will not be put to shame.
Lord, call me out into the unknown once again and give me a greater revelation of who You can be in my life when I surrender.
